Wish You Were Here

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Wish you were here
Wish you could squeeze my hand until all sensation has left me
Wish I could still hear your voice
Your desperation cries
Even when it was to scream how much you hated me
Wish you would let me hit you hard in the face
Tell you how your self-destruction is the only life boat I got
Beg you to stay
So we could have a chance at hating life together
Wish you were here
We both know that the eternity talk is bullshit
Cause no matter how high I get
No matter how much my skin itches
No matter how much my eyes, abused by any and all light, make me want to rip them off
I can’t feel nearly as much pain as when we were together
Wish you were here
This life was freaking beautiful with you
Every morning I would wake up
With your strength in my arms
And even if I knew we were doomed to fail
I felt unbreakable, unstoppable
Just like you did
Wish you were here
Nothing was easy with you
It was a bullfight
Every move was heavy and loud
You pulled me to the ground
You were my struggle between the air and mud
You made me feel alive in the midst of dying
You made me matter a little more
I fucking wish you were here
Why did you leave me
When our love was the most beautiful pile of shit I’ve ever witnessed?
Why didn’t you take my hand and burn with me
Burn the people and places we loved
Burn the pictures
Burn the words
Wish you were here
There is nothing to live or die for, now
No rainbow bruises on my bodily picture
No spear to splint the pillar of my spirit
No more screams, no more laughs
I thought your power was louder than your absence
But you only left silence behind you
Only silence.

Wish you were here…

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3 thoughts on “Wish You Were Here

  1. How sad to long for someone who has clearly, GREATLY, distressed you, torn your heart apart, hurt you so deeply. Heading for the light, love, even if it’s only a flicker, is much better ultimately than drowning in darkness. Blessings that you will a way out of your misery. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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