Look at me, Mother

Look at me Mother
Don’t slide your eyes away from me
Don’t try to laugh it off
Don’t laugh me off

Look at me Mother
Don’t tell me you need to think about it
This is not a question of thinking
It is not an essay topic which requires a strategy
A structured argumentation you know your ways around
This is you looking at me
The real me
Not the debater
Nor the funny kid

Look at me Mother
The years have drawn the wrinkles in the palms of my hands
Can you see this skin sculpted by the flow of sweat and tears

Look at me Mother
See the eyes of a child who fought too hard
My arms carrying years of heavy nightmares

Look at me Mother
Look at this body beaten down by shame and dirty secrets
These hands that curled up in fists under the bed sheets
Scared of the touch

Look at me Mother
Tell me if your heart can weigh my hurt
Tell me if your love for me still expands as each second ticks
Tell me that your sea will not leave my desert to dry
Tell me that these stars are not dead as they still shine tonight

Look at me Mother
I am tired of living in the shadows
I am ready for the sun to remind me how it feels like to burn
For the ocean’s waves to hit me in the face
And remind me that I was meant to breathe

Look at me Mother
You have always been my rock, my shore
You, who have taught me to love
Don’t tell me you can’t love me

Look at me Mother
Please help me, cause I can’t come out as these written words do
Please hold my hand as I break down my pretty prison walls
Please pick up the pieces of me scattered on the floor

Look at me Mother
As I’m trying to make you see what I can’t bring myself to tell you
As I’m trying to tell you that your little girl
Also loves women


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